News Flash: New Atomic Element Discovered

A major research institution has announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science – Governmentium. It has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 111 assistant deputy neutrons for an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons that are further surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like sub-particles called peons.

Governmentium has no electrons and is therefore inert. It can be detected, however, since it impeded every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can take a reaction that normally occurs in seconds and slow it to the point where it takes days.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of three years.

It doesn’t decay but "reorganizes," a process where assistant deputy neutrons and deputy neutrons change places. This process actually causes it to grow as in the confusion some morons become neutrons, thereby forming isodopes.

This phenomenon of "moron promotion" has led to some speculation that Governmentium forms whenever sufficient morons meet in concentration, forming critical morass. Researchers believe that in Governmentium the more you reorganize, the morass you cover.

Source: Unknown

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About waynem

As a Minnesota based photographer and artist I have been greatly influenced by the Upper Midwest. I focus my skills and energies on portraits, landscapes, cityscapes, architectural and fine art work. My best work comes from images first painted in my mind. I mull over a prospective image for weeks or months, seeing it from different angles and perspectives, then finally deciding what to capture. The result is images that deeply touch people's emotions and powerfully evoke memories and dreams. My images are used commercially by companies and organizations ranging from Financial Services firms, mom and pop Ice Cream shops and The Basilica of St Mary to communicate their shared vision and values. Book and magazine publishers have featured my images on their covers. My photographs also grace and enhance the decor of many fine homes.
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2 Responses to News Flash: New Atomic Element Discovered

  1. Lyn says:

    W, Did you just make that up? That is funny! Submit it to Carnival of Comedy, and I’ll HT you at my site. (You spell checked too! 🙂 lgp

  2. New Element Discovered

    HT to Questions and Answers regarding the new atomic element, Governmentium. Very funny. Wish I would have thought of it.

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